I've been pinning since Pinterest was a pilot. Well, not really but I have accumulated 4800 pins across 61 boards over a couple of years.
Shout out to Coumba Zoumanigui for introducing me to Pinterest!!!
I started a wedding board called "Whenever it happens, its alraedy planned" which includes any pretty wedding thing I thought I may like when that day (last Thursday) came around. I've have often said that if I leave it up to Pinterest, my wedding would be in a barn, on a beach in a garden in the city. It makes no sense.
Studio 450 NYC - A loft in Chelsea that wants $10,000 JUST for the room, not a table or chair the first... smh
How awesome would this be??
Clear chairs on a beach??? AWE-SOME!!
Any hoo,
Once getting engaged, I needed a summary pinboard that contains anything that is halfway realistic (like Wedding Pie) . This is called "Blah Blah Blah" because after a few months of wedding planning, that is probably all anyone will hear out of me. I apologize in advance.
As an FYI for those who haven't been through this, once you get the ring and share the good news, you have to get it resized and insured.
Here is what I learned...
Insurance:
Chris got the insurance because it needs an appraisal and I don't want to know too much detail about my ring. I want to take it for face value and its representation.
You can use a ring insurance from an actual ring insurance company (Perfect Circle) or add it to your Renters' or Homeowners' policy.
If you add it to your policy, make sure to get a "ring rider". A rider is another name for additional coverage added for specific items or situations. This ring should be tied to the address where the ring lives.
Average costs are at around $15 per month or $180 per year.
Resizing:
Some guys may have asked your size before the proposal, others may guestimate, some women probably have no idea what size they actually wear.
My ring was a size 6 and I needed a 7.
I yelped a jewelry repair guy and landed on AY Jewelry near Times Square. When it comes to your ring.. YELP YELP YELP!!! I trust my fellow yelpers and I don't always trust merchants.
Many places require you to send the ring out for a few days to a week to get resized. It's amazing how you can be introduced to something and suddenly can't leave it alone! I guess Chris was the same way. (mushy moment)
I wasn't sending it out. There are places you can get it done while-you-wait. This is New York City, someone could do it.
What was important to me was that I could watch the entire process. There was NO WAY I was letting that thing out of my sight.
He cut a sliver into the ring, stretched it a bit and got started on his 1000 step process (only took about 30 minutes) which included dipping my diamond into some blue liquid, setting it on fire, dripping new platinum, buffing, steaming, dunking in other liquids, steaming again.... I mean, it went on and on.
Planning a wedding is a daunting task. Luckily, I've been bred for this. I have always been an artist and as I grew older, my "art" turned to homemaking. I've drawn tattoos for people (that they have actually tatted on their bodies for life. *pats self on back*), hang my own art in my home, design clothes, make jewelry, upholster chairs, refurbish furniture, tile tables and pretty much any other DIY experiments you can think of. I say all this, because I have potential to be one heck of a party planner. I love it. It gets me going.
However, I have this weird idiosyncrasy that doesn't allow me to plan for myself, only others. I usually stray from being center of attention or over-the-top in any way. But I'm feeling something come out of me now.
It's amazingly overwhelming how I can watch so much wed/decor/dress television and now, it actually applies to me. All those checklists I may have skimmed over in magazines are now ACTUAL ACTION ITEMS. Seriously????
Really knot.com?????? ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY-NINE TO-DOS????? *facepalm*
So.. as you can see, I have tons to do...
I have gotten questions on colors, location, etc.
My thoughts on that:
Colors depend on the venue, so I don't want to put the cart before the horse. Dark colors in a spring botanical garden?? No way... Pastels in a hotel ballroom?? Meh... I have to see the background of the big picture before I start coloring it in.
Location: This is the first thing on my mind. I can't "Save a Date", select colors, or budget properly until I know exactly where this is happening. This probably needs its own post.
I think, right now, after the Marriage strategy, I will have the following order of operations to set ourselves up
Venue - Can't do anything without it
Date - need a venue before setting the date. What if the venue is unavailable?
Diet!!! - Get cuter before photo sessions
Engagement Photos - Memorialize this time in life, without the pomp and circumstance of a wedding
Guest List - Who gets a save the date?
Website updates - After all the info is collected, we can share
Save the Date
Party Planning Details (Seating, Decor, Floral, Attire, etc)
I have always had my idea of what priorities are necessary when entering a marriage:
Soft-skills: Love, Respect, Communication
Self-explanatory
Financial Planning
Find an accountant, financial planner and get our financial plan in order. Since finances are probably the #1 strain on a marriage, I want to have plans A,B,C,D,and E in place to ensure this is something we have to worry less and less about.
Pre-Marital Counseling
Although its very exciting to get caught up in the party-planning of it all (which is crazy/stupid fun to me), it's more important to focus on what happens AFTER the party, the marriage, the rest of our lives. While Chris and I have dated for years, know each others families (another very helpful aspect to our relationship), I can't imagine that we have cracked the surface on some of the trials we will experience together in the coming years. I would rather start thinking about these scenarios and situations now rather than crossing the bridges when we come to them. It would be naive to think we can address all issues that may come up in a few counseling sessions, but it seems like a better idea to get start thinking about them now rather than being surprised later.
It's going to happen, but if we can get ahead of it, let's do so
Home Ownership
I have always wanted a house. Growing up in a small family, it was never necessary for us to live in a large home. I grew up in apartments and townhouses. But I always wanted a house with a yard of my own. So that is in our plans. Hopefully, we will accomplish this goal in a reasonable amount of time.
Then... we can get to planning a party to honor all of the friends and family who have supported us and our relationship over the years...
Thursday, October 24, 2013... after 6 years and lots of changes (mostly moves on my part)... my man finally popped the question.
I said yes. (Surprise Surprise :P)
Chris and I at a Long Island Ducks game (Summer 2012)
Since getting engaged I've noticed the trend in questioning, which is completely normal. So I figure I can use this blog to document my excitement, planning, history, and just overall feelings on getting married and changing my ENTIRE life to be with the man I love until I die. That's really deep.
WANNA HEAR IT? HERE IT GOES...
How long had you been dating?
Chris and I have been dating for 6 years.
How did you meet?
We met online on October 24, 2007 (Thanks Match.com). We started slow and worked our way through Yahoo messenger, phone calls (he had a dreamy voice), and the eventual first face-to-face Starbucks date. That date would be our cover for actually meeting online for a while. We would tell people "we met at Starbucks"... it was true. We did. ;)
Have you set a date?
Not yet, this is less than a week old.
Ballpark: We are thinking a Spring 2015 wedding.
Where is he from?
Chris is a native New Yorker from Corona, Queens.
Are you both staying in New York?
Currently we are both gainfully employed in New York, so if it ain't broke....
How did he propose?
October 24th was the 6 year anniversary of the day we "met" (Depends on what you consider "meeting" but its the only date we can remember, so we work with it). We planned a low-key dinner at Bobby Flay's (my fav celebrity chef and Queens native) Bar Americain in Midtown. No gifts, just dinner and a good time.
As probably any woman in a long term relationship, I wondered where this was going. So that morning, I felt a little anxious to talk. Chris gave me assurance the day would be a happy day and to put any worries aside until the weekend. Just focus on the now and be happy. He's a sweetheart. I love him for that kind of stuff.
So I did. All day I felt anxious, with a knot in my stomach and couldn't figure out why. I thought because I had to give a presentation at work. But it went off without a hitch and I still had a knot. But I gave my worries to God and decided to just have a good time.
We had a great dinner, steak and raw shellfish shooters and enjoyed a couple of cocktails. We spent the date reminiscing over the past six years, sharing inside jokes and enjoying each others company. As we got back to my apartment, we walk up the steps of the brownstone and into the building. As we get to the top of the stairs and in front of my door, I try to unlock it. I hear the doggy bag hit the floor. My thought was "did he trip over the stairs?" I turn around and he is on his knee.... It still didn't click, I still thought he tripped on the stairs. lol. I swear, the rest happened in slow motion, he pulls out a ring and blurts out "WILL YOU MARRY ME?" and I'm stunned. I totally did not see this coming, let alone in the hallway of my apartment.
I stared and had to gather myself.. and counted to 6. Six seconds for 6 years is a fair exchange ;) And I said yes.
HE DID GOOD!!! (It's been resized since this pic. I promise, it fits)
After I finally got my door open (which was a struggle given the events) and got the ring on my finger. I screamed, I shouted, I jumped up and down, I did a celebratory booty dance.
Next Steps: Call the parents....
We tried to hold it in and revel in it for a while, but I was totally bursting. I called my Mom first, who was elated. Then I put Chris on the phone with my father to ask for his blessing. Chris informed his father and brother the following day and his mother a few days later (she was in India and they played phone tag for a while). The came extended family.
There is so much protocol to this, its insane. Who do you tell first? How? Text? Email? Call? Do your parents do it?
I swear, telling people ended up being a first-come first serve situation. We held it in until his mother knew, and then it kind of became a free for all. No regrets. Everyone knows now.
Peep this extra-cute announcement my friend Aja made for her us to share on social media...
